Of all that God created, one thing did not meet with His approval. With regard to Adam, He said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). The Creator designed people for emotional, mental, and physical intimacy—to share their innermost selves with one another.
Jesus taught His disciples that they should love each other as He had loved them. (John 15:12). In a God-honoring friendship, two people build each other up and spur one another toward Christlikeness. Many people, however, don’t have relationships that sharpen their faith (Proverbs 27:17). They instead settle for the trivial talk of casual acquaintances, about things like the weather or world news.
But the best relationships don’t shy away from vulnerable conversations. Fruitful friendships can begin when men and women risk their pride and comfort to discuss accountability, biblical living, or anything meant to motivate one another in holiness. When there’s trust and submission, two people can confess sin, offer gentle reproof, and share burdens.
The walls we build to keep people at a distance are often defenses against God as well—to keep Him out of our dearest personal business. But if we share openly with a brother or sister in Christ, we will learn to be more honest with God too.
These days, many of us would rather rely on ourselves than on one another. It’s common for neighbors to treat each other with suspicion instead of congeniality—and that goes for church members too. Independence may be a prized attribute in our culture but not in the Bible. Nowhere in Scripture will you find the erroneous quote “God helps those who help themselves.”
The very fact that the Lord formed the church—a community of believers—reveals He did not create people for self-sufficiency or isolation. In God’s design, a close, committed biblical friendship between two believers serves to build both toward Christlikeness. Look at any of the saints in Scripture and you will find evidence of reliance upon a close friend or confidante for support. Paul, in particular, spoke freely and often of his dependence upon dear companions, and he encouraged others to form intimate partnerships as well (Philippians 2:1-2).
God’s Word tells us to love one another, bear our brothers’ burdens, and confess our sins to fellow believers (John 13:34; Galatians 6:2; James 5:16). This means we’re to give ourselves away to others and receive from them in return. God designed this mutual encouragement to result in greater holiness throughout the body of Christ.
Many people today are weighed down by the guilt they carry. This is understandable for those who’ve rejected Christ, but Christians have been relieved of their guilt through faith in the Savior. In other words, there’s no point in a believer continuing to live under that heavy burden. Forgiveness of sins is based on the riches of God’s grace and the sufficiency of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross.
When Jesus said, “It is finished,” He was proclaiming that redemption for sins was accomplished (John 19:30). He paid the full price with His death, and now all who believe in Him are forgiven. The scope of Christ’s atoning sacrifice reaches back to the past, into the present, and beyond to the future. That means we never have to fear that something we did in the past or might do in the future is beyond the reach of God’s forgiveness. The Lord never takes back His pardon.
Because of our faith in Christ’s completed work on the cross, we can be assured that we have received and will continue to receive His divine mercy. But that doesn’t give us license to sin (Romans 6:1-2). Rather, it should produce gratitude along with deeper love for God and a passion for holiness.
A gift is something given willingly and without expectation of payment. Everything we have is a gift from God—especially our salvation. We haven’t earned anything except condemnation for our sin, yet the Lord graciously pardons us through faith in His Son.
Just as God grants us forgiveness we don’t deserve and can’t earn, so we are to willingly give this same priceless gift to others. To forgive means “to relinquish all claims to punish or exact a penalty for an offense.” No strings or conditions can be attached, or else it ceases to be a pardon.
Unforgiveness is emotional bondage that consumes our mind with memories of past offenses and fills our heart with churning unrest and a desire for revenge. Its tentacles reach deep into the soul, affecting both spiritual and physical health. But the one who puts on a heart of love, compassion, and forgiveness will receive the peace of Christ. When God’s Word dwells richly in us, thoughts of anger and vengeance will be transformed into praise and gratitude to the Lord.
Many people consider pardoning an offender too hard to attempt. But forgiveness isn’t something we have to manufacture in ourselves. It’s freely given to us by the Savior, and our job is simply to pass it on to others.
Our prayers reveal what fills our hearts. David understood this. After being confronted by Nathan regarding his sin, David pleaded to be cleansed and to receive a clean heart (Psalm 51:9-10).
When we allow unconfessed sin in our lives, God won’t hear our prayers because it creates a barrier between us and Him. He’s promised to forgive transgression once we admit our action is wrong and turn away from it (1 John 1:9). But if we only give lip service to our confession or refuse to change ungodly ways, we haven’t truly repented.
Since we can’t always discern what’s hiding in our hearts, it’s wise to pray as David did in Psalm 139:23-24, “Search me, God, and know my heart; put me to the test and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there is any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.”
Prayer is the communication link between us and our loving heavenly Father. Let’s not allow anything to block our relationship with Him and hinder our prayers. Instead, we must confess and turn from all known sin so we can come to Him with a pure heart.
