Forgiving those who have seriously hurt us is one of our most challenging assignments as believers. And merely having a desire to obey God or say the right words does not necessarily accomplish the task. Old memories and pain can slip back into the mind, stirring up emotions of anger and injustice.
Though we have a responsibility to take the initiative soon after suffering harm, forgiveness for deep hurts is a process. Begin immediately to prevent a root of bitterness from developing. But remember: The deeper the hurt, the more time it will take to work through forgiveness. Never become discouraged—the Lord will walk with you each step of the way.
Confession to God is the beginning of the process. Come before Him, admitting any resentment and acknowledging it as sin. As you lay your anger and hurt before the Lord, let Him begin to heal your broken heart.
Sometimes the process can also involve going to the offender and confessing your sinful attitude toward him or her. This is a time not to build your case or itemize the culprit’s wrongs but simply to admit your own. Although the offense against you may seem greater than your unforgiving attitude, avoid the temptation to rank sins. And leave judgment to God.
Forgiveness brings freedom from the agitation that accompanies resentment. In working through the process, you’ll begin to see through God’s eyes—and with His compassion—when you look at the person who hurt you. Eventually, you will be able to thank the Lord for the opportunity to learn forgiveness and live in His lavish grace.
Forgiveness can be defined as letting go of both resentment and the right to return hurt. On the other hand, unforgiveness demands that the guilty one pay for the wrong he or she did.
According to these definitions, unforgiveness looks very much like justice, and forgiveness seems inequitable. That’s why we have such a hard time with it. Forgiveness goes against our natural sense of fair play. Yet God calls us to forgive those who don’t deserve it!
To avoid offering a pardon, we dwell on the wrongdoing until our desire to retaliate seems totally justified. Convinced of our right to be angry, we demand repayment, thinking, Releasing a person from deserved punishment is unfair!
The Father faced the same dilemma. All humanity had sinned and deserved eternal separation from Him. He couldn’t simply forgive sin arbitrarily, because He’d then cease being just. Our forgiveness is possible only because divine justice was satisfied by the Son’s payment for our sins. As a result of Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf, God is free to righteously forgive us.
When we accepted the Lord’s forgiveness, we gave up all rights to hold anything against anyone else. An unforgiving heart is miserable because it is far from God, who is the source of all peace and joy.
Does the thought or sight of someone arouse harsh feelings within you? Holding onto a grievance will keep you imprisoned in emotional turmoil, but letting go will set you free. Christ has provided the key of forgiveness. Take hold of it, unlock the door, and walk out into the light.
Anyone who studies God’s ways soon realizes they are quite different from man’s ways. Worldly wisdom tells us that extraordinary people and abundant resources are needed for great tasks, yet the Lord often chooses the small and insignificant to achieve His purposes on earth.
For example, Christ selected a rather ordinary group of men as disciples, yet after being filled with the Spirit, they turned the world upside down. During His ministry on earth, Jesus fed thousands with a child’s meager lunch, and He viewed the widow’s two small coins as a greater offering than all the larger amounts given (John 6:5-12; Luke 21:2-3).
To accomplish His tasks, God specializes in using people who aren’t naturally qualified. Moses was a verbally impaired 80-year-old shepherd who liberated a nation. After Gideon hid from the enemy, God made him a valiant warrior. David was the overlooked youngest son, yet he killed a giant with a small stone and became Israel’s king and a man after God’s own heart.
The Lord isn’t looking for impressive people; He wants willing ones who will bow the knee in humble submission. Being weak and ordinary doesn’t make you useless. Rather, it positions you for a demonstration of divine power in your life. God delights in using our dependence to display His glory.
Have you ever considered that your lack of ability, talent, or skill is the ideal setting for a great display of Christ’s power and glory? If you are willing to submit to His leading and venture into the scary yet rewarding territory of faith and obedience, He will do great things in and through you.
Sometimes a difficult situation can make us wish we could run away. Unless we keep our eyes fixed firmly on Christ and our trust anchored to God’s Word, desperation to find relief may tempt us to take matters into our own hands. That’s what Onesimus did. He was one of the millions of slaves in the Roman Empire, and the day came when he decided he’d had enough. Not only did he run away, but he also stole from his master.
Although Onesimus thought he was charting his own course by fleeing to Rome, God directed his path to the apostle Paul, who led him to Christ. In his attempt to become free, Onesimus discovered the joy of becoming a devoted slave of Christ. Now Jesus was his Master and Lord, and that meant he had to correct his wrongdoing and return to his earthly master. Since runaway slaves faced the death penalty, Paul interceded on his behalf with a letter to his master Philemon, a fellow believer whom Paul had apparently led to faith.
Until a certain point in his life, Onesimus had not lived up to his name, which means “useful” or “profitable.” (See Philem. 1:11.) But Christ changed his life, and he became a “beloved brother” who ministered to Paul during the apostle’s imprisonment (Philem. 1:16).
Onesimus’s story demonstrates how God’s sovereign hand works in our life even when we’re determined to be our own master. Once we repent and surrender to the Lord, He redeems our failures and uses them for His glory. The things we remember with shame now become examples of God’s grace and power to transform lives.
Our God-given purpose is to glorify our heavenly Father. Ephesians 2:10sheds light on the means by which we accomplish this: “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works.”
As believers, we are responsible to do God’s work. One day, we will stand before the judgment seat of Christ and be held accountable for our service. “Judgment” can be a daunting term. Remember, though, that Jesus redeemed us by His death and resurrection and paid the penalty for our sins. He took our punishment, and we no longer face condemnation (Rom. 8:1). Christ’s judgment for Christians determines His rewards for each believer.
During this evaluation, God will test our actions. Today’s Scripture passage likens this to proving the quality of a substance through fire (1 Corinthians 3:12-15). Once the fire burns away impure motives and worthless tasks, the Lord will give recompense for that which remains.
From the outside, we may look as if we’re living obediently, striving to honor Jesus. So many tasks appear selfless and honorable, yet underneath the noble appearance, there can be ugly motives. We often deceive even ourselves about the reason for our actions. Since our desire should be to please Christ, we can ask Him to purify and change our hearts.
Consider your actions over the past few days. How much time and energy did you spend serving Christ for His glory? This can include any area of involvement—not just efforts related to church. Ask God to reveal whatever is driven by a selfish motive and needs to be brought under His authority.
