When someone repeatedly wrongs us, we often try to draw a line at the number of times we’ll accept apologies. In other situations, we may attempt to categorize which offenses we’ll pardon. But Jesus drew no such lines at the cross. God’s unconditional pardon of our sins means that our forgiveness toward others should likewise have no limitations—even when certain behaviors can’t be allowed to continue.
Another issue is the temptation to hang on to resentment for a time instead of forgiving instantly. But when we cling to unforgiveness—even for a short period—Satan can gain a foothold. If the Father’s will is that we forgive, why should we wait?
Forgiveness is painful and costly—Jesus felt every nail, every thorn. But a truly forgiving spirit knows that good can come from the unfortunate situation. For instance, “good” could take the form of God developing our character or perhaps exposing our weakness to drive us closer to Him.
Realizing God is sovereign makes us more ready to forgive. Let’s trust Jesus to remove any desire for retaliation—and to provide us with the wisdom and strength necessary to act in ways that please Him. And when it comes to forgiveness, let’s approach our offender with the intent of reconciling. That means doing whatever God directs in order to get our relationship right—just as Jesus did for u
Did you know it’s possible to extend forgiveness to another person and yet still cling to resentment? We might say everything is okay, but our unpardoning spirit remains—and it will linger until we emotionally release the other person from the wrong he or she did. Thankfully, there’s a way to truly move on:
• First, assume responsibility for your unforgiving spirit, and choose a change of heart toward the other person. The healing process begins with repentance.
• Then, release your hold over the debt you feel is owed.
• Recognize the other person’s violation has exposed an area of weakness in you—namely, your resentment and desire for vengeance.
• Finally, remember how often God forgives you.
The Lord is grieved to see His children cling to an unforgiving spirit, because emotional debt imprisons us. We become paralyzed by our own distrust, resentment, and insecurity, which only build walls that shut out family and friends. In contrast, God’s goal for us is freedom from bitterness. He wants to see us reconcile with our offender and even show tenderhearted, loving acceptance. We have a calling from God to forgive. Though that can be difficult, it is possible because Christ lives in us (Galatians 2:20).
Many Christians find it troubling that they repeatedly deal with certain sins. And they rightly turn to 1 John 1:9 for assurance: “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous, so that He will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” They’re relieved to know God forgives our sins, and they promise to do better. But some people have misunderstood this verse—they believe our salvation is tied to continual confession.
There’s a big difference between relationship (the unbreakable Father-child bond) and fellowship (our line of communication). Certainly confession plays a vital role in maintaining intimate communication with the Father, but the believer’s standing as His child cannot change. Fellowship with God is interrupted by sin (Psalm 66:18) but restored when we confess and repent. Then we are freed from the emotional bondage of guilt and shame.
As we mature in our faith, the inclination to sin will decrease. But as long as our earthly life continues, we won’t be fully free of fleshly tendencies. Romans 8:1 offers this additional reassurance: “Therefore there is now no condemnation at all for those who are in Christ Jesus.” So, while our sin may have temporal consequences, we can be certain God has fully pardoned us.
Procrastination has serious consequences in many areas of life—especially when it comes to spiritual matters. You see, every person is going to spend eternity somewhere, and the destination is determined by a choice in this lifetime: We each must either accept or reject Jesus’ offer of forgiveness of sins. Some people think they can delay this decision until death is near.
Unfortunately, there are several problems with this reasoning. First of all, there’s no guarantee that you’ll have any warning before death. Second, by spending a lifetime rejecting Christ’s offer, you run the risk of developing a hardened heart. Repeatedly saying no to God may result in being unable to say yes when death comes knocking at the door. In fact, you may not even be interested in Christ’s offer anymore. Then you’ll face the terrifying reality of judgment, as you stand before God without a Savior (Hebrews 10:26-27).
By putting off a decision for Christ, you not only lose the immediate blessings of a deeply personal relationship with God now; you also risk permanent separation from Him for all eternity. Don’t procrastinate! Place your faith in Christ today. Acknowledge your sin, ask His forgiveness, and trust Him as your Savior and Lord.
Throughout the world, people are mistreated and traumatized, and many carry deep scars throughout life. Not everyone’s experiences are extreme, but even mild hurts can fester, affecting relationships and self-image. Something as common as betrayal or rejection by friends or family can lead to distorted thinking and negative behaviors.
Unhealed hurts can lead to various symptoms, such as feelings of inferiority, fear of failure or criticism, and oversensitivity. Some people cope by criticizing others in an attempt to make themselves feel better. Others misinterpret innocent comments as personal attacks. Hurt can also overflow as unpredictable anger, as a person who’s been wounded is more likely to lash out at others. Sometimes those with a distorted self-image become loners because they’re overly concerned about others’ opinions of them.
Now and again we’re bound to experience some of these feelings, but God doesn’t want us to be trapped by the hurts we’ve suffered. Nor does He want us to be so crushed by our experiences that we feel worthless. Those who know the Savior will find comfort, healing, and trust in the Father’s love. Then, painful experiences can make us more like Jesus so we can glorify Him with our responses.
